There is an old saying that we were given two ears but only one mouth. The implication is that we should listen more than we speak. According to the Wall Street Journal, most of us need to work on our listening skills. Honing this critical ability can really improve our overall performance.
The Advisory Board put together a synopsis that covers the highlights of the article:
Shellenbarger cites a 1987 study that found most people only remember 10% of what was said in a face-to-face conversation after a brief interruption.
Sadly, say researchers, our listening skills have probably only declined in the digital age. A 2006 study of college students showed they spent about 24% of their time listening to others in individual or group conversations, down from 53% in 1980.
It goes on to explain why listening is so important:
Being a good listener is important in the workplace: A 2007 study of 3,372 workers in the Academy of Management journal found that managers' listening plays a large role in employee engagement. Specifically, employees who believe their bosses are not listening to them are less likely to offer helpful suggestions and new ideas. They are also more likely to become exhausted and quit, says another study.
How can we improve? Be aware of when we "tune others out":
For instance, she writes, some people fail to listen properly because they are focused on what they want to say next, while others filter the conversation based on preconceived assumptions or expectations about the other person. Julian Treasure, an author and speaker on conscious listening, compares listening with such filters to "listening from a kind of concrete bunker."
Here are some quick tips:
Communications skills coach Barbara Miller recommends doing a "brain dump" on paper before a conversation in order to acknowledge the thoughts that could distract you from the conversation.
If all else fails, says Treasure, remember the acronym RASA:
- Receive the information by paying attention to the person;
- Appreciate what he or she has to say;
- Summarize what the other person said back to him or her; and
- Ask questions after the conversation is over (Shellenbarger, Wall Street Journal, 7/22).
Here is a link to the original WSJ article: http://online.wsj.com/articles/tuning-in-how-to-listen-better-1406070727
This link is to the Advisory Board summary: WSJ: You're probably a bad listener. Here's how to be better.| The Advisory Board Daily Briefing
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