End of the innocence

Yesterday was the first real confirmation. We had suspected it was coming, and it had already arrived.

As we were getting into the car to go to the Pinewood Derby, we were talking about Easter. My youngest has already said that Easter is his favorite holiday because of the baskets filled with candy and gifts. We said that maybe since the boys were still working their way through their Halloween candy, we should tell the Easter Bunny to pass our house by this year. We got some half-hearted resistance and we went on our way.

Once we had arrived at Bass Pro Shops for the event, we started out of the car. I guess my wife overheard the boys talking. Apparently, my oldest said, "You know there's no Easter Bunny, right?" "I know," replied his brother. I don't know whether or not he did, but at this point the illusion was completely undone.

The seeds of this revelation were probably planted in the months before. Earlier in the year, the older brother lost a tooth. There was some confusion over whether or not he was going to put it under his pillow. In that haze, the communication between his parents misfired and the Tooth Fairy conveniently missed her scheduled pickup that night. If there was skepticism going into the evening, it was a raging fire of disbelief by morning. The Tooth Fairy tried to cover with a note saying "You may not believe in me, but I believe in you." Too little, too late.

A few weeks later, little brother lost a tooth. This time, we were more prepared and planned for the regular extraction. We put the kids to bed as normal and thought that they were fast asleep. My wife left a dollar on the stairs as a reminder to herself. Older brother suddenly burst from the room and went to the bathroom. On the way, he spotted the dollar on the stairs and knew instantly what it was for. The Tooth Fairy had breathed her last in our household--never to be seen again.

I am not sure if it was the next day, but my wife eventually showed the boys all of the teeth that she had dutifully collected over the years. I suppose it was inevitable at that point to make the connection between one mysterious figure to all of the other childhood wonders.

A part of me finds this bittersweet. At some point, the boys were going to grow up. One of those requirements involves shedding the simple fictions that mask more complex dynamics. At the same time, this progression also reminds me that they are both a little closer towards losing the innocence and purity of childhood. It's a virtual rite of passage and it only seems to be accelerating.